Finding a new way to say Happy Birthday

I'm back from my week of "training" at one of the largest greeting card companies in the world, and let me tell you that writing funny greeting cards is a lot more work than you'd think.

I had a fantastic opportunity to spend five days at American Greetings, where I talked to writers, got to sit in on copy reviews, and learned what makes a funny greeting card. I was surprised at how much work goes into writing cards and how much funny material doesn't make the cut simply because it isn't sell-able. (For example, you can make a really funny dark joke poking fun at some truth about weddings or marriage, but who's going to buy the card?)

I got to do some writing exercises and then sit down with the head of the department and have him walk me through what worked, what didn't, and what might have potential. Talk about intimidating! It's not easy to have an editor critique your work via email; imagine sitting there having someone say to your face, "Nah, that stinks." Fortunately, I'm motivated to sell more cards, and so I took everything I learned to heart. Besides, it wasn't that bad after you got through the first few rejects. And when I saw how many cards the inhouse writers do that don't make the grade, I felt a lot better.

I think I know now what goes into a funny card; whether I can write them is another story. I've sold three cards before this trip, and after spending a week at AG I can see why they sold and why others didn't. Knowing what doesn't work is probably just as important as knowing what does, so all in all I think the week was a huge success. Hopefully, they feel the same way!

One of the benefits of working from home is the ability to crawl out of bed and head straight to work in your pajamas. The unfortunate thing is that occasionally the writer hermit needs to venture out into the real world, posing some fashion dilemmas.

Next week, I leave for a week of training at American Greetings. I'm going to learn how to write funny cards, which is great since AG pays their freelancers very well. And I'm going to need to make some money since in order to for this training I had to go buy new clothes.

It seems that since April or May, I've gained some more weight. My husband says that it's because I've been stuck in the house playing Clara Barkton and that once I can get back into my walking habit I'll be happier. Except that, in case no one has noticed, it's October, which means my walking days are numbered until spring.

In any event, here's a piece of advice for writer hermits: occasionally paw through your closet and make sure you have a couple of outfits that you can wear in public in case of emergency.